Another Curveball From the Universe
Reason 9 million why my life is completely surreal right now: I just received an email from my father informing me that the wedding plans have been "moved up" and he'll be flying to San Diego on Thursday (from Mexico, where he lives) to get married.
WTF?
Okay, 1: What wedding?
2: What engagement?
3: What wedding?
4: You decided that email was an appropriate medium with which to communicate this information?
Yeah, he and the GF have lived together for years. But I had rather assumed that by this point they wouldn't bother getting hitched. They're old, what does it matter?
So now, as an only child, guess who will probably get to tell my mom about this? Although she essentially left him, I know this won't be easy for her. And I hate having to be the bearer of bad news.
Apparently there will be a party of some sort in Mexico in September to celebrate the "marriage" (my dad's third, but who's counting right?) If I really wanted to be a brat, I could bring along Mr. 46 as my date. Wouldn't that add some controversy to the nuptials? Not that I am quite diabolical enough to do this. Only to daydream about it.
posted by Red Photography @ 3:37 PM
4 Comments:
My dad was semi-engaged for a while, and this is the tack I used on my mom:
"Hey, Mom, guess what weirdo thing Dad did this time?"
Never underestimate the value of mocking the ex.
Yeah, my dad showed up to visit me at college with his soon-to-be bride on his arm. Whom he'd been dating for about three months at that point. They're still married and it's been about nine years now, so ... whateva. Still, I understand exactly how you feel.
My mom told me about her wedding, but I wasn't invited. She actually called on my birthday to tell me about her engagement to the man, whom I'd never met.
What's with parents?
OK, first take your own pulse.
Now, the fact that he's living with GF in Mexico make this less of a surprise and more of an annoyance, correct?
As my parents get older,...they get absolutely crazier and they were pretty nuts to begin with.
You have every reason to be upset that the man who begat you didn't tell you about his nuptuals in a timely enough manner to make you feel as though you weren't an afterthought. The deeper issue here is that, in his mind, his own daughter's opinion doesn't matter. I don't know if I am reading too much into that but it would seem that with two marriages in the rearview...he doesn't have the best decision-making track record.
I don't see why YOU have to be the one to tell your mother. First off, does she need to know? If so, for whose purposes? If she DOES need to know then perhaps somebody who is actually getting married should tell her. If it's important to your dad that she know...then he needs to tell her. If it isn't important to him but just to you then perhaps you need to consider "why" as much as "how".
I am sorry if I've overstepped on this comment. Just trying to be helpful. Whatever you decide is okay with me.
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