hey pretty

Ceci n'est pas une "dating blog."

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Perfume For Hipsters, By Fat Cats

Corporate attempts to commodify youth culture continue. The latest charade? Calvin Klein's latest incarnation of it's mega successful CK One.

The Gen-Xers (oh, I know, ouch) among you probably remember that one. It co-opted the popularity of grunge culture, launched heroine chic, and was aimed at both men and women. It smelled a little like pine trees. I really liked it when I was 17. But give me a break, I came from a sheltered environment and was too naive to know any better.

Well, CK is trying to duplicate the popularity of CK One with CKin2u. According to a company spokesperson, speaking via the New York Times, CKin2u was conceived as a fragrance for the "technosexual generation."

Huh, what's that now? That sound? Oh yeah, that was just sound of all of my skin being eaten by a serious case of the willies. Let us continue.

I wasn't sure what the "technosexual generation" is either. Lucky, he goes on to explain. "Technosexuals" is apparently a new marketing buzz word for young people who use text messaging and blogging in order to meet and arrange hookups.

Yeah, yeah, I know. All the cool kids are doing it these days. But ew. Something about that description kind of makes me want to stop blogging forever and communicate with others only through Morse code. I feel, I dunno. Dirty.

It also makes me feel somewhat ashamed to be even tangentially involved in the practice of professional marketing. Yes, I know. It's Capitalism, get used to it. Corporations have been making a fast buck off of youth culture for zillions of years. I hear ya. Perhaps its just the blatant commodification of young people's sexuality that grosses me out. Navigating the dating/hookup scene is hard enough. Youngsters hardly need some corporate suits in corner offices trying to make a fast buck off of it. For every cool kid who successfully negotiates a late-night tryst via text message, there a dozen others nervously checking their inboxes and wondering why their crush is ignoring them. Do we really need the marketing geniuses at Calvin Klein exploiting this dynamic? Methinks not.

And what about the morning after? Maybe someone should get on that potential gravy train. Why don't we have a fragrance that embodies the giddy uncertainty of what comes after the arranged-by-cell-phone-(most likely) drunken tryst? Can you bottle smudged eye-liner, bed-head, morning breath, discarded condom wrappers, stilted conversation and that glorious moment before the curtain of what-the-fuck-did-I-just-do falls? Because if you can, they probably will.

Not that my own perfume, or anyone's for that matter is 100% noble and pure. These days I am favoring Pomegranate Noir by Jo Malone. It smells like musty old books growing in a forest. By amorous tree sprites. Yes, it's that good.

I'm feeling punchy today. In the comments section tell me what a perfume would smell like if a marketing exec could bottle the essence of you.

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13 Comments:

Blogger EJ Takes Life said...

Did you see the NYT article about it today? It's hysterical. These marketing people clearly have no idea what they're talking about. Apparently the "technosexuals" on the "Interwebs" aren't "getting the 411" on the "olfactory concept." Fo shizzle.

As for me, I'm a Burberry girl. I like my perfume to say "I'm quietly judging you."

4:54 PM  
Blogger Frankly, Scarlett said...

-hangs head in shame as she wore CK1 circa 1995-

5:25 PM  
Blogger Matt said...

So we at 30 and 31 are NOT genexers? ARe we Gen. Y?

I am aghast that technically I am a technosexual and I know what you mean about morning breath and my clothes all over the floor and the smell of used condom on the nightstand (sometimes you forget one or two of 'em) and booze everywhere.

Hmmmm, you save your best stories for off-line.

6:24 PM  
Anonymous zandria said...

Technosexual? You've got to be kidding me. I agree with you. It makes me not want to be a part of it. Aren't they "in the know" enough to know that people don't want to be labeled? They would keep their technosexual-speak to themselves and use it only for internal memos, if they knew what was good for them. :)

7:36 PM  
Blogger Virgle Kent said...

The funny thing is that real “hipster” or the ones in NY don’t even shower, let alone use perfume or cologne.

But as far as cornering the morning after scene you described. Axe body wash is all over it, according to them, “it’s the only way a dirty boy gets clean”. By the way it’s the only deodorant body wash I use.

Oh yeah and condoms??? What are those? You kids and your funny sex toys

7:37 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's "heroin" chic, dude. Heroin.

8:57 PM  
Anonymous Sweet said...

Technosexual, oh man oh man. So wrong.

11:24 PM  
Blogger Hey Pretty said...

Ej- Yes, that's what inspired this entry. Burberry. Very nice. I approve.

Scarlett--It's all good- you probably didn't know any better either.

Matty--I dunno. I guess the pathetic fact that I was enthralled by Douglas Coupland novels, Nirvana, and Reality Bites (ouch) answers that question rather effectively. As for not giving up the good stories online--yes, you are correct. I just can't bring myself to spill the deets of my sorid past. That's what whisky shots and in smokey bars are for. I promise to entertain you with some good stories next time we meet if you promise to reciprocate.

Z---I hear ya. Those labels can remain in the TPS reports--where they belong.

VK--Hey stranger! yeah, i forgot about the Axe ads. Not as sorrid and Cindy Shermin-eque as I'd like, but you do have a good point. I'd like to see similar ones from a more feminist perspective, tho'.
Anon--yes, you are correct. My spelling is atroshus as always.

Sweet-sing it, sister.

2:12 AM  
Blogger recovering overachiever said...

I thought exactly the same thing as you. Technosexual sounds so creepy.

2:12 PM  
Blogger wlin said...

Coporations are so stupid. They can get it for free. But they insist on buying it, owning it, ruining it.

I also made a support post on Nuzmo.

9:10 PM  
Anonymous perfume blue said...

Ah….the sweet, smell of perfume! Today's market is flooded with hundreds and hundreds of different fragrances ranging from floral to woodsy. Most women love the smell of perfume, wearing it even when going to the grocery store. The problem is that perfume allergy for some women, is anything but nice.

2:59 PM  
Blogger Alex said...

my god, the humanity... I did not know about this. I was just feeling thankful that the retch-inducing term "metrosexual" had finally faded from popularity, and now they had to go and come up with that. A thousand times worse!

2:18 AM  
Blogger BM said...

Blog is masculine.
Un blog.

9:04 PM  

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