upDate

Having spent close the seven years in DC, and having been unmarried and in my twenties for all of them, I am like many women here, something of an expert on dating in this city. My experiences have been varied--serious relationships, rebound relationships, one night stands, intense relationships that combust after three weeks, being the "other woman", on-line date lunches, friends with benefits. I've never accepted rent money in return for my companionship or anything but suffice to say, I've experienced quite a bit of what DC has to offer in terms of courtship options. Regular readers know of course, that this has made me a bit cynical. I've been adamently anti-relationship for about two years now, 1.) because I simply wanted the breathing room; 2.) because until then I hadn't done much to date around. Of course, in that time I have come to be known as one of the wilder persons of my various social groups, which was okay for a time but now I'm thinking that I'd like to do away with that particular aspect of my reputation. In other words, it's time to slow down and grow up a bit. For this reason, I have been trying to be more open to the idea of dating and less quick to just hook up for the sake of short-term companionship.

So as I mentioned yesterday, I had a date. An an effort to protect this lovely boy's privacy, I won't go into much of the details. But since many of you have asked, I will say that it was quite wonderful. The set up was typical--adult beverages, a little food, dimly lit bar, hours of conversation--so many that the metro closed and I had to take a cab home, lots of "getting to know you" banter as well as more serious stuff, a moderate amount of cutesy behavior, a chaste good night kiss, and a solo cab ride home. I know, you are SO proud of me, right?

What I find interesting about this situation is that I feel like we're equals in a lot of ways. I don't feel as if I've relinquished emotional control to the other person or that I need to listen to agnsty chick music for hours on end wondering when, and in what creative way he'll flake or start acting like a total prick. I don't think I have ever felt that way after a first date before. Even my favorite relationships I've entered with my breath held, waiting for something to go wrong. It's a strange, and very grown-up sort of feeling. That alone makes the situation mildly terrifying of course. Potentially problematic is that fact that he's skinnier than I am. Sort of unsettling, right?