hey pretty

Ceci n'est pas une "dating blog."

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Opposites Attract, Part Deux*

So everyone, myself included thought it was incredibly funny when I was dating the wanna-be Alex P. Keaton, young Republican several months back. Oh, ha ha, we all thought. In between her trips to the Whole Foods for soy products and yoga classes, HP finds herself compromised by he-of-questionable-political-leanings. Even the WaPo's Express got in on the fun. And as predicted, it lasted all of five seconds. Okay, to be fair to both of us, the actual relationship lasted all of 3 days. And politics had nothing to do with its demise. But you can bet that they were cited on numerous occasions as one of his many faults/reasons why fate cut the party short as promptly as it did.

And yes, since then I have cited conservativism as a major deal breaker. I had good reason to, and even if I didn't, I was heartbroken at the time, so I think that would count for a something. Anyhoo.

I have once again found myself wading in the waters of a similar situation. Just wading, mind you. It began a couple of months ago, when I was simply sitting on the shore of said waters, gazing placidly at their murky depths, wondering "what if." I hadn't even expected to visit the shores that day. But somehow, I got there, and somehow it hit me (as in, full-on epiphany, something actually clicked in my head) "Huh, those waters look pretty appealing. How can that be?" So here I am, up to my calves in it. The waters are warm, and although the tides are smooth, the undertow feels strong.

As a cynic/afraid to get hurt again/drama queen/etc, I have of course, taken the liberty of building a list of mutual differences in my head. It's lengthy. He's in the armed-forces for crying out loud. But as always, other humans fascinate me so much that I can't help but venture in for a closer look. I am simply mesmerized by the possibility that people who have few things in common could be drawn to one another. Also of interest is the fact that my neat little stereotype regarding men in the armed forces is being blown wide open. Yes, they perform a great service for our country and do a ton of shit that I certainly don't want to do (namely running around in the desert being shot at) but in my experience, many of them are also out of control jackholes** with few IQ points to rub together. Of course, many are also extremely brave, strong, loyal, kind hearted, and polite. In fact, in writing to Lulu earlier, I posited the following theory (which would have been the title of this post but it sounded too Carrie Bradshaw-ish): Could military boys be the new knights (think about it). Let's just say that I am developing a new-found appreciation.

So here's the deal: Totally different backgrounds and value systems. The other day he asked me what I like about him, and my answer had more to do with intangibles like what I feel like when he's around, or what his presence feels like (basically, like I am being pulled towards him, conscious decisions be damned). Lulu has already encouraged me to not dwell so much over the differences and to enjoy the actual situation (you mean, not over-analyze and make myself miserable wondering when it's going to end? I'm not sure I follow...) and I'm trying to. I'm delighting in staying up late and receiving the bestest, most polite and well-worded text messages apologizing for being kept up late. And most of all I'm delighting in the thrill of the new. Not just a new crush, but a new crush on a new kind of person. I'm not going to posit the inevitable, "can it work?", because of course it *can* work, not necessarily between me and X, but between people like us, somewhere else. Heck, anything is possible. The question is, will it, and more interestingly, how will it?

*Navel-gazing starts here, proceed with caution
**New word courtesy of Lulu

5 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Awesome! May I point out that I have the natural reaction you'd expect from an Amherst alum when you said "armed forces" - but by the end of the post, I've changed my mind... I hope it goes swimmingly, and all turns out well.

Squee? (if 1: it is appropriate here, and 2: guys can use it too.)

- DS

8:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As long as you're liberal, you'll continue jumping from man to man wondering what went wrong. You'll blame it on conservatism, but in the end, it will turn out to be your own selfishness that was the "dealbreaker."

8:30 PM  
Blogger sparkles anonymous! said...

Well! Kudos for Anon #2 for implying that that conservatism is a cure for selfishness. Funny, I hadn't noticed.

(Says Liberal Girl dating Conservative Boy - and quite happily, I must add)

8:36 PM  
Blogger Hey Pretty said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

8:59 PM  
Blogger Hey Pretty said...

Selfish. Interesting, I'm intruiged. I don't normally consider myself to be a selfish person, dear anonymous. Perhaps that's it. Surely, we're all selfish in our own little ways. Anyway, I'm not 100% clear on what gives you the authority to proclaim me "selfish" but it's certainly something to chew on. Other than that, "jumping from man to man" is a bit harsh. If anything, they jump to me.

10:13 PM  

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