A First Date is No Occasion for Feminist Grandstanding

Shoutout to my fellow peons stuck in cubeland today! Can you believe the bullshit audacity that some employers are displaying by making us come to work today? This morning I rebelled slightly, sleeping in several hours and rolling into the office at 11:50. Yes, I will need to make these hours up. And yes, I have two meetings today. WTF?

The title of this post is the quote of the weekend. I'll get to it in a second.

First, let me say that because I am a complete and total stud, I had not one but two dates on Saturday! (in addition to a slightly random friday-night hookup but that's neither here nor there). I decided to do this not out of some compulsion to meet the man of my dreams, but more because I wanted the practice.

Date #1 was an afternoon coffee date at Tryst. My companion has a lovely british accent. We flirted and bantered for a while and then we walked around Adams Morgan and then I sent him off to take a quick siesta before he had to meet up with his friends.

Date #2 was for drinks later on. My companion was potentially insane, but extremely entertaining and very smart. He's been published in McSweenys, just to give ya'll an idea of how brilliant and quirky he is. But there is a possibility he's a roid-head as evidenced by the following clues:

1.) He is STACKED.
2.) He told me he sometimes loses his temper and gets angry at inanimate objects.
3.) He got mad at me for paying the bill. Were he a cartoon character, steam would have been coming out of his ears.

You're probably wondering why any sane girl would pay for the first date. Afterall, aren't dates a great way to score some free food and alcohol? In most cases, yes. However, he ordered a Scotch and didn't touch it, and because I love Scotch, I finished it for him after I drank my Amstel Light. Okay. So this wasn't the most ladylike behavior, but I was feeling comfortable with him and sometimes it's better to be yourself than to pretend you're something you're not. Anyway, the check came when he was in the restroom so I took care of it. He was not happy about this and informed me, to quote my own title that "A first date is no occassion for feminist grandstanding." To me, feminism had nothing to do with it. I simply am of the opinion that if person A consumes person B's drink, then person A should pay for it. But whatever.

It is now Monday and I haven't heard a peep from either fellow. Both seemed to be having a good time with me. I texted British boy and thanked him for a lovely time but no response and I just emailed roid-head to thank him as well. It's possible that I won't hear from roid-head because I offended his delicate senisibilities. And it's possible that British boy didn't have fun afterall and I am just a poor reader of other people.

Time will tell.

Anyway, if you're reading this post today, you are no doubt surfing the internet pretending to be doing your job. Know that after my 2 bullshit meetings I will do the same, and perhaps even post again if you're well behaved. What would you like to read about today, my blog-reading darlings?